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Government Wildebeest Urban and Suburban Relocation Programme

Bringing the Serengeti to your semi-detached

Beta This is a new service — your feedback will help us improve it. 2,847 wildebeest have been successfully integrated since we launched.

Contact the GWUSRP

Contact the programme if you have a question about applying, hosting, or a wildebeest in your care.

Before you contact us

Your question may already be answered in the frequently asked questions. The Department has noticed that 81% of calls to the hotline are answered by that page. The Department is proud of that page. The remaining 19% of calls concern the silence.

If your question concerns a wildebeest’s accent, the Accent Assessment Team has its own contact details, including an email address with a 25MB attachment limit.

Wildebeest Concern Hotline

0800 111 9453

Open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, except during Pointless, when all staff are watching. Calls are recorded for training purposes. Some recordings are kept for research. The Department does not publish which.

Email

[email protected] — application enquiries. Responses within 28 working days. If your enquiry concerns the status of your application, the answer is that your application is being processed.

[email protected] — questions about published figures. Responses are not guaranteed. The figures are.

Post

Department for Levelling Up, Housing and Wildebeest
PO Box 4472
Nuneaton
CV11 4WB

Post is answered in 28 working days. The Department recommends not enclosing photographs of your garden. The Department will not be drawn on why.

In person

GWUSRP Office, Nuneaton. Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm.

The office shares a building with the Accent Assessment Team and the Hadrian Institute. The sign for the office was stolen in 2024 and again in 2025. The Department has stopped replacing it and now directs visitors by telephone. The office is on the second floor. The lift is used by the Hadrian Institute. The Department does not discuss the lift.

Your liaison

Every host is assigned a GWUSRP liaison. Your liaison’s details are printed on your integration progress form (WB-INT-01). If your liaison does not answer, they are either on leave, on a home visit, or watching Pointless. The Department does not distinguish between these.

Emergencies

For the situations described under reporting concerns — unauthorised food ordering, opinions about the Royal Family, and similar — call 999 and ask for the Wildebeest Division.

What happens next

Contact method Response time
Telephone Immediately, except during Pointless
Email 28 working days
Post 28 working days
In person Same day, if you can find the office

Complaints about the service itself should be directed to the Department for Levelling Up, Housing and Wildebeest’s complaints team. The complaints team does not exist. The Department believes this is the most efficient arrangement.

Wildebeest do not have telephones. If a wildebeest in your care appears to have a telephone, do not mention it. Report it within 48 hours and leave the room.

Give feedback

Thank you for your interest in providing feedback.

The GWUSRP feedback service is currently unavailable. This is because the team member responsible for processing feedback is presently dealing with a situation involving a Phase 3 wildebeest, a Waterstones membership card, and what the Cheltenham constabulary have described as ‘a disagreement about contemporary fiction.’ We are unable to provide further details at this time.

Your feedback is important to us. Please try again in 3 to 5 business years.

Service information