dog SE From £199 Order

Companion Systems

dog SE

The future of companionship.

From £199.

dog SE
Bipedal One bark a day 28 teeth One meal Stationary Zero hips Bipedal One bark a day 28 teeth One meal Stationary Zero hips

Why SE

We didn’t remove features.
We removed compromises.

Dog SE is not a budget product. It is the product we would have made first if we’d started with a blank sheet of paper and an honest assessment of how people actually live.

The conventional dog is an overengineered product. It ships with capabilities designed for a world of predators, prey, and open terrain — a world that does not exist in a one-bedroom flat in Kidderminster. Dog SE was designed for the world that does exist. Your living room. Your kitchen. The three metres between your sofa and the place where you keep the dog food.

Every component that was removed was removed because it was costing you money and providing nothing in return. Every component that remains is there because it serves the only purpose that matters: being present, in a room, with you, without making your life more difficult.

Engineering

Inside dog SE.

Six systems. Six decisions. Each one made by asking: does this serve the customer, or does it serve the dog’s ancestors?

By the numbers

Dog SE, in detail.

35%
Smaller footprint
50%
Lower food costs
14
Fewer teeth to maintain
1
Bark per day
£1,600
Lifetime food savings
200+
Components removed

Unboxing

What’s in the box.

dog SE
One dog SE, configured for stationary companionship with two legs, 28 teeth, and an extremely specific sense of purpose.
Basic food bowl
A single bowl, appropriate for the single daily meal. Not dishwasher-safe, because it will be licked clean regardless.
Welcome leaflet
A folded A4 sheet covering placement, feeding, and what to do if the dog SE appears to be looking at you with unusual intensity.
Installation note
Professional installation recommended for any Additional Leg Pair purchased separately. Self-installation is documented on a single page.

Technical specifications

Full specs.

PriceFrom £199
ArchitectureBipedal (2 legs)
MobilityStationary platform
Maximum rangeStationary (repositions within a room)
Audio outputStatus Bark (one bark/day, non-configurable)
Dental configuration28 teeth (essentials only)
Carnassial teethNone
Daily meals1
Annual food cost (estimated)~£190
Olfactory range~3 metres (right-sized)
CoatStandard (low-shed)
TailNot included
LoyaltyOptional add-on (£79.99)
Walks requiredNone
Vet visits (estimated annual)1 routine check-up
Lifetime dental savings~70% vs conventional dog
Lifetime food savings~£1,600 vs conventional dog
CompatibilityAll indoor environments
In the boxdog SE, basic food bowl, welcome leaflet
Warranty1 year standard

Reviews

What SE owners say.

★★★★★
“I live alone in a one-bedroom flat. I work long hours. I wanted a dog but I couldn’t justify the cost, the walks, or the noise. The dog SE costs less than my sofa. It sits in the corner of my living room and it is there when I come home. It barks once a day, at 3:47am, which is not when I would have chosen. I contacted Companion Systems. They confirmed the time is non-configurable and that the bark is a diagnostic routine rather than a request. I have started setting my alarm for 3:46 so that it does not startle me. This was not the relationship I expected to have with a dog. It is the relationship I have.”
E.K., Kidderminster — dog SE, 7 months
★★★★★
“I had a conventional dog before. It was fine. It was a dog. It had four legs and it barked at the postman and it needed walking twice a day and it once ate an entire birthday cake off the kitchen worktop and then was sick on the carpet, which was not the dog’s fault because the cake was left unattended, but it was also not a situation I wish to repeat. The dog SE does not eat birthday cakes. The dog SE does not have the reach. The dog SE does not have the metabolism. I am at peace with this.”
D.W., Rotherham — dog SE, 4 months
★★★★★
“I bought the Additional Leg Pair for my dog SE and attempted self-installation. The documentation is a single A4 page with a diagram and the words ‘professional installation recommended’ in bold at the top. I did not read the bold text. The installation took four hours. The dog SE was patient throughout, in the way that only a dog with no alternative can be patient. The result is technically four-legged but the rear legs face slightly outward and the dog SE now walks in a very wide circle. I have contacted support. Support has been understanding. The warranty is under review.”
A.B., Nuneaton — dog SE + self-installed Additional Leg Pair
★★★★★
“I did not purchase the loyalty add-on. Companion Systems were clear about what this means. Without loyalty, the dog does not distinguish me from the rest of the room. I am, to the dog, a warm surface that occasionally produces food. I have made my peace with this. The terms are honest. The dog is present. It barks once a day to confirm it is still operational, which is more than my previous landlord did. I find I prefer the dog.”
F.N., Burnley — dog SE, 5 months

Order

Get your dog SE.

From £199. Available Q3 2027. Free delivery within mainland UK. Additional charge for Scottish Highlands, Northern Ireland, and anywhere requiring a ferry.

The new dog is a living animal and is not a consumer electronic. Companion Systems Ltd is registered in England and Wales. Part of joel2.com.

DogConnect

Your dog, connected.

From £4.99/month. Compatible with all models. First Dividend in 100 days.

Learn more